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Question: What should I tell my Mom?
Question Description:
My mom is 35y/o 5'6" and 185-190lbs. and rising She gets very angry and impatient with every one and I think its because she has little confidence and low self esteem.I try and help I make all the meals do all the grocery shopping ask her to walk the treadmill for a 1/2 hour once and a while.She respondes by buying pork rines and pizza rollsSitting on the couch or in bed snacking. She tells me I'm paranoid and says since i'm 110lbs I have a distorted image of what people should be.I'm 18 5'5" Healthy and have my 14 y/o brother and my Dad on a straight line to being healthy. How can I stop her from becoming something I know she doesn't want to be?
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Answer#1: Have you tried just sitting down next to her and calmly discussing it? Like, "Mom is there something wrong that I can help you with?" Instead of being a nag, try figuring out for sure what is going on. You can play the guessing game all the rest of your lives and get no where. The other thing to remember is that it is her body. She has the right to decide what she wants to do with it, even if it is the wrong thing to do. You need to examine your motives as well. Are you a control freak? It sound like you are controlling everyone except your mom and you can't stand it. Back off and take a look at what is going on between you and the others. Also, as long as it seems there are no major health problems cropping up, your mom might just be fine the way she is, even if it is maybe 20 or 30 lbs. more than you think she should be. Lighten up.
Answer#2: This can be hard. The last thing she wants is to be told by her own child that she's overweight. But for health reasons, she does need help. Try having your father talk to her about it, or ask him to get your mom's doctor involved. You never know- she could just be too humiliated that it came from her own kid.
Answer#3: You really can't make someone lose weight that doesn't want to. Maybe lay off for awhile and encourage to do some counseling. Also sneak in some exercise. Ask if she wants to spend time with you. Take her hiking or for a long walk. If you do something fun, sometimes you don't realize you are working out.
Answer#4: You can't. Until she decides she does not want that for herself you cannot help her. Sorry. I know how you feel.
Answer#5: Your mom is upset emotionaly try to fix her on the inside before working on the outside. People look as good as they feel if you resolve whatever it is that is bothering her she will take more pride in her appearance.
Answer#6: go to the gym with her
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